Enigma Boysluv - 6 "Unintentionally" Bromantic Movies
Every now and then I like to take a moment to break away from animated men and tell you about some "yaoi"
in live action movies. So to make the distinction I'll call it "bromance." The "" is because I wonder how unintentional
all this really was. (SPOILERS AHEAD)
For all those who havent seen it...
Edward Norton's character essentially creates a crazy,
sexy, smart and perverted alter ego to cope with the numbing monotony of his life. But he doesn't realize the
figment of his imagination is just that.
The bromance...
Other than the fact that Brad Pitt's character is everything Tyler Durden (Norton) wanted
to be in life, they spend incredible amounts of time together. Norton spends the 1st half of the time shunning or hating
on the only woman in the movie. Norton describes their weekly routine and likens he and who he believes is Tyler to Ozzie
and Harriet, the seemingly dysfunctional married couple in "The Ozbourne's."
Norton and Pitt have a heart to heart about their fucked up father's and how thy really don't need another woman in their lives while Pitt bathes.
The driving force behind much of the movie is the near hero worship that
Norton feels towards the man his mind creates. He admires him to the point of clingy-ness and even complains about
"being dumped" when Tyler is nowhere to be found at random times towards the later half of the movie. Then when he sees
Tyler favoring a new "recruit to Project Mayhem, he beats him half to death at a Fight Club meeting soon after.
Norton reads aloud while Pitt rides around with his shorts down.
Was it "unintentional?"
Lol. Heck no.
For all those who havent seen it...
In the not so distant future men like Ethan Hawke's character are doomed
by their own genetics to be failures in life. Ethan's high aspirations however lead him down a dangerous road and
drive him to assume the identity of the genetically superior Jude Law's Jerome Morrow.
The bromance...
Due to the nature of their contract, Ethan and Jude's character form a rather
interesting and symbiotic relationship. They live together and since
there can be only one, Jude/Jerome must stay rather tucked away at home and prep samples while Ethan
becomes the breadwinner and maintains the lifestyle to which Jude has
become accustomed.
Jude celebrates the new Jerome's success as if it were his own.
They enjoy celebratory beers and drinks at a grungy bar like most guys. Not pictured: Grunge, beer or bar
Throughout the movie, they often hint at admiring one another for the qualities the other lacks, especially Jerome.
As expected Ethan is impressed by Jerome's genetically innate abilities. But Jerome is more impressed with Ethan's
heart, bravery and perseverance. jerome is often sore about the act that with all his genetic superiority he did
not achieve in his life's goals, but only borrowing his name Ethan could touch the stars.
At the end of the movie, when Ethan finally does go into space, he reads the card Jude gave him and finds a lock of his
hair. Now this can be taken as he just wanted him to have another sample. But minutes before in the movie Jude
had clearly made him enough samples to last him two lifetimes, so there would be no need for that lock of hair. I'm sure
I don't need to mentioned that the whole lock of hair thing is something a woman gives her boyfriend. After seeing this
the new Jerome states he suddenly has a hard time leaving the planet he so wanted to get away from.
Was it "unintentional?"
No. It's almost mild enough to be confused with healthier than average male friendship, but no.
For all those who havent seen it...
A dark, magical and brutal pissing match between two performers
Christian Bale and Hugh jackman who's endless obsession with bettering their craft comes
at the cost of everything they thought they held dear.
The bromance...
After watching the movie it becomes clear that it wasn't so much the magic and
the cheers of the crowd that these men fancied. They lived only to out do one another. From the untimely death
of Jackman's wife early on in the movie, all events from that point forward was a tit for tat battle of who had
the bigger dick. The women in their lives never seem to hold their interest for long and are often carelessly used
to hurt the other in some way or completely neglected in their magical endeavors. Jackman, even though one would
think that the death of his wife because of a botched act with Bale would have fueled all this rivalry
he bluntly states "I don't care about my wife!! I care about his act!" Scarlet Johansan's character
gets passed around like a doobie
between Bale & Jackman much to her chigrin:
Was it "unintentional?"
Maybe. I can seen rivalry between men getting this bad.
But the fact that that their women seemed increasingly unnecessary, forgotten or mistreated makes me think
otherwise.
For all those who havent seen it...
What rock have you been under? Mutants good and bad fight the good fight
against humans physically or politically in response to being treated like 2nd class citizens.
The bromance...
Wolverine spends much of the film trying to find out more about his past.
More funny than sexual, Mystique crawls into Wolrverine's tent one night to offer him what he really wants.
Was it "unintentional?"
Nope. But only for the sake of a joke. I lol'ed
For all those who haven't seen it...
Kevin Spacey as Lester Burhnam drifts through the doldrums of middle aged
life in suburbia. His silent rage at those around him and contempt for the person he's become is quelled when
he meets some eclectic characters and sees some "hot jail bait ass." They shake him from his daze and he lives his
life with the enthusiasm of a younger man again. What little of his life is left anyway, unbeknownst to him.
The bromance...
The is there or is there not homoerotic theme in the movie is no accident.
Chris Cooper plays Col. Frank Fitts, USMC, a supporting character, begins to question his son's sexuality as
he believes his son's relationship with his girlfriend's father Lester appears to have
crossed the line to something inappropriate. There are a few such instances where Lester alone or with the son
manage to wave a big rainbow flag in the face of a deeply homophobic man.
Was it "unintentional?"
Nope. In fact it was used to cover up the twist in the plot.
For all those who havent seen it...
A young woman (Naomi Watts), saddened by the death of a young girl on her shift as a midwife,
finds clues in the girl's diary that prompt her to delve into her and her child's life and ultimately get her caught in dark, seedy and
violent world of a Russian mob family. Viggo Mortensen plays both friend and foe as a deep undercover cop who may have been under too long.
The bromance...
Wow, where to begin. Viggo Mortensen character Nikolai and Vincent Cassel's Kirill
have a surprisingly affectionate, tight knit relationship for mobsters. Kirill is more tightly bound to Nikolai than his own
father. Kirill is volatile and is often disliked by many. But Nikolai takes his peculiar nature in stride and reacts to his
odd, unpredictable, or clingy antics with a warm, caring smile. Now that would seem downright brotherly if not for a few choice moments in the film.
Kirill is literally clingy and always opts for strong physical contact while all others in his family tend to be a bit more
reserved. After a night of heavy drinking, Kirill collapses on the floor then crawls over to lay at Nikolai's feet.
While at his father's favorite brothel, Kirill loses all interest in the woman he's with and goes to interrupt Nikolai's "good time"
by sitting on his lap and whispering in his ear asking who he'd fuck today.
Wait...it gets worse
If that weren't bad enough Kirill takes the woman
Nikolai was enjoying and shoves her away like she offended him by existing and demanded Nick fuck someone
NOW so he can watch and make sure he wasn't "a fucking queer," rubbing his chin as he says this. Surprisingly Nick agrees:
That's not all...
Aside from Kirill, the film in general has a heavy theme of not so covert homo-eroticism. When Nikolai
goes before the mob heads to see if he is worthy to become part of the family, he must strip down so they can
have a good look at him. Dead serious. According to their tradition, your whole life is tattooed on your body. But it's still a bit...
After they give their ok, he's given more tattoos. In an even more homo-erotic scene, he lounges on red velvet couches
nearly nude sipping Vodka while the tat guy goes to town. He could have put some clothes back on but of course he
doesn't.
There's more?!...
Three words. Nude. Fight. Scene.
Since I'm sure this visceral bit of cinematic "bliss" is a major selling point for the DVD, so I'm only posting pics of it. Go rent or buy it at you next immediate convenience.
Was it "unintentional?"
...How could it be?!
Feel free to help out by sending your ideas, suggestions and even fanart of guys wet and soapy!
I'm going to be making a lot of Yaoi and fanservice related lists, video and just pics.
Have an idea of something funny or weird about yaoi that can be listed please
Let me know!